Saturday, 17 March 2012
Kicking Ass and naming names...
This is My Big Fat Canadian Ass. The little one is my kid. But this isn't about her, it's about me, and my ass.
March 17th, 2012, 3 days before my sixth wedding anniversary. Six years to the same man that married my 220lb BFCA, it's a bit bigger now but he still loves me/it....
I've run the gambit of diets from Jenny Craig to Herbal Life, GI Diet and Weight Watchers. You name it, I've probably tried it....I even "liked" Big Beautiful Wellness on Facebook where they promote "bigness" and how it's OK to be fat.
It is OK to be a little chubby or have a muffin top. But when you are talking 60 to 150 lbs OVER your ideal weight that is, as the posters in the doctors office say, morbidly obese. ya, I know that is an ugly and offensive description of us fat people. But, it's the medical terminology. so, live with it, or change your description.
I get wall posts from BBW with pictures of huge women in bikinis and they're hanging out all over and honestly, I really don't think that these pics are flattering. I find them kinda gross. And, well, I would never force anyone to look at me in a bikini. Cuz, um, eew.
All the talk of "love who you are", "Big is Beautiful", and "It's good to have a little meat on your bones", is all just subjective fodder for the lazy, self-indulgent, sedimentary 'lifers' who want the world to accept and be OK with fat people so they don't have to get up off of their fat asses and exercise.
Now, before you dismiss this as an offensive bitch slap the poor misunderstood fatties, let me tell you something, I played that role- the lead in fact- for many years. I tried and succeeded at fooling myself in to believing that just because I was fat didn't mean that I wasn't healthy.
You can be a big girl and be healthy, but if you're gasping for air at the top of one flight of stairs and you can hear your heart pounding in your ears, then you are fat and NOT very healthy.
Stop fooling yourself. Own it. you're fat, unhealthy and only YOU can change it.
Step 1- Accept that you are fat.
Step 2- Understand that it's not permanent or the end of your life.
Step 3- Decision time.....Change it or not.
(if you chose 'not' then go back to your bag of Doritos and make sure you order that casket in XXL. If change it, then go to step 4...)
Step 4- Throw out the Doritos.
Step 5- Get moving.
Step 6- Keep moving.
Step 7- Eat better,and in moderation.
Step 8- Love your life and the courage it took to get to step 4.
What I am writing here is harsh, blunt and to the point.We hear it every day, all day. We make excuses for it every day, all day.
Fat chicks like me need to stop excusing that we are fat and start saying "No More!"
I'm saying no more. I have many reasons for for making this commitment, the first being that the only thing I truly ever committed to ( aside from my spouse and kid) was my neglect of self. It's so much easier to do nothing and slowly die then it is to get up and move.
Another reason is I an 42, 300lbs and can't touch my toes without putting a lot of effort and swearing into it. That sucks.
The harsh reality is that I'm moments away from a heart attack or diabetes, or some other God awful illness and who's fault is it? Mine alone. No one else to blame. Just me.
It's time to change it. Time to be accountable. Time to take control. Time to get My Big Fat Canadian Ass out of those size 24 jeans and into a pool, onto a treadmill, over a spin bike, OFF of itself.
Today, I got up, had a single sandwich and a glass of water. took my kid to the pool for a few hours and had some more water. Then we had greek salad and roasted chicken for dinner. Right now, I'm at work on my break and I think at lunch, I am going to walk around the building cuz my ass is huge and I want to make it smaller. I have decided.
I invite you to follow my blog and tell others too. If changing my world makes someone else at least think about changing theirs then I will have accomplished one of my goals.
I will tell you though, I won't mince words. I will tell the truth and all the ugly bits with the good bits, my ups and downs, and my screw ups and my successes.
Here goes....I'm jumping now. Wish me luck!